I woke up staring at my windows every single week, praying to God to answer my prayers.
I start my day with a smile but only few could see through that smile but the truth is when they ask me; how are you? my answer will always be I’m okay, well if you ask me that’s the right answer.
In our society many just ask you how are you for just the sake, of course we all know sanitation is not love so it’s like people are trying to fulfill a certain moral rule by asking you if you okay.
The truth is, do they really care? let me give you the statistics, out of ten people that asked how are you, maybe, just maybe only one or two cares and when you try to tell them your problems instead of saying I’m fine, so many will say in their heart:
“I gat mine to deal with, ain’t going to listen to yours”
and sadly but true, some will be glad that you facing such problem.
It’s a world with fake smiles and many fake people because many of us go out there suffering but yet smiling.
We only need God, he sees us for who we are and because he cares he will listen to my heart desires and when he does I smile to myself knowing that, truly, I am okay.
A pinch of prayer is my push-on recipe, and yes I’m guilty. I get the food salty most times only when I feel the quantity is getting real massive. As you see, I can’t even write about my problems plainly, I’ve learnt in this generation to hide them in smiles and when writing I encode them pretty like I’m web designing for it’s a funny web we find most of us caught in, in this age, for most times a problem shared is only halved if you were lucky enough to have delivered it to the right ears else it becomes a problem broadcasted and multiplied.
So no, when it seems like this cross I carry is weighing me down I simply mutter a smile though it may be hard, do me a crucifix sigh and kiss the finger that gets lucky, most times the digitus secundus manus, for I understand that most of the times I get a letter of peace, the writer most likely wrote it wielding the pen tightly with the middle finger, so I seal my lips tightly except God is the one listening.
I hate stupid hashtags, but fake smiles is a trend I just can’t help but follow most times.
But truly I’m okay, for God replies even my heartbeat, he hears it all.
(i) Emmanuel Anaiye Ifebunmi