Location: Ekosodin (Somewhere Around UNIBEN)
Time: Dark in the Evening
Victim: (can we really call him that? He was kinda paid)
The story below is one fiction-ed out of reality, the experience of “someone”.
That fateful night, everywhere be good o, fly nigga Kadiri was on his way to his lodge which was quite on the inside in Ekosodin. He had just purchased an Infinix hot 4 about a week earlier, listening to music has never been lovelier, he had his ear pieces jammed tight ramming good musics in moderate decibels in his ears, Life’s good, and this is no LG thing.
Just few turns shy of his destination, events took some sort of turn, a seemingly light tap on his shoulder jacked him back to reality, and there was this bros with a realistic grin of “show! my guy, dey with me!”
My people and then the following conversation ensued:
(Caller drags him softly to the others…)
Caller: Guy you dey enjoy oh, you just dey tear gbedu, which phone b that sef?
Kadiri: Bros no o, I just dey o, na one torch light like that o… (lies in hope of escaping)
Caller: Torchlight??? For this recession period? you nor know say torchlight don turn hot cake? Shoo.. you be big boy o, make I see am na…
Kadiri: (Heart racing, knows better than to make bros repeat himself a second time) ***Brings out the phone***
Caller: haaaa… this torchlight make sense o… see as he clean! you na correct guy o, no be Tecno phantom 6 b dis???
Kadiri: No o, bros, na just hot 4 o…
Caller: Guy make I see the ear piece first (collects the ear piece too and puts it on) Ah! see jamz! Guy you make brain, follow me first. (takes him off the roadside to the beer hub beside and continues talking..)
Guy, you dey squeeze face?
Kadiri: No o… (quickly forces a smile on)
Caller: Guy shey you be christian?
Caller: shey you dey like give?
Kadiri: Yes… (Scared0
Caller: Confirm guy! Na man u b, take am (shakes Kadiri’ trembling hands) see, shey you also know and believe wetin Bible talk say if you give you go receive?
Caller: ooooo, guy you too legit!… Madam! (calls on the owner of the bar) give my guy one correct star dia make he taken dey well, im na correct guy!
I’ve been seeing a post around “paid in a full glass of milk” but in this one, that’s how Kadiri got paid in a full bottle of beer!
His phone’ tale gave Solomon Grundi a tough time, bro slept well that night but following nights had him awake in pains… things broses at Ekosodin do, you don’t feel it immediately.
NOTE: Kadiri is a pseudo name for the subject in this tale, and I mean no disrespect to the bros by tagging him Caller, I don’t mean anything disrespectful o, I don’t want to hear the callertune “Dey With Me!“… PLEASE.
Moral Of The Story: BE WISE IN ALL YOUR DEALINGS IN EKOSODIN. (WHAT SHALL IT PROFIT A MAN TON USE HIS PHONE FOR A WALK AND THEREAFTER LOOSE IT FOR A LIFETIME)