Me and my Guy

Me and my guy, I mean me: H3B and Johnny are probably the most ridiculous duo one can ever preach to. You doubt? Let me give you two instances detailing how ridiculous we get at times, hard before I agreed though.

On that faithful evening, Johnny was ‘jejely’ that is calmly walking on his own o, when this gorgeous damsel bumped into him in a way that even frightened him, to cut long story short, next thing as Johnny was still recuperating, turned out she had bumped into him to preach to him and of course invite him for a program, then Johnny began.

After few words, lady: are you born again?
Johnny: As I am seeing you right now ehn, I don born again sharp sharp, in fact, now I am sure I am saved, see baby you are beautiful!…
Now the lady was getting perplexed and went on to politely say: thank you, but…
And she was cut short by an eager Jonny: calm down babe, don’t worry, with the way you are beautiful, you don’t need to preach too much… And the lady realizing Jonny was a lost cause decided to cut to the chase and went on to make known her intention of inviting Johnny over to a program.

Lady: … I’ll be needing your number and…
Johnny: oooo babe why are you trying to stress yourself na, you won’t need to call me, I will be the one to do that, you give me your number…
As Johnny continued, not given chance to speak again, the lady took to her heels but trust my well trained Johnny na, he followed up, sister please wait, wait, won’t you preach to me again, at least give me your number now… , he continued on speaking quite loud until the girl ran out of sight.

Lady: excuse me, excuse me, good evening… How’re you?
H3B : I’m good, you?
Lady: I’m okay, what’s your name?
H3B: H3B, you?
Lady: Precious
H3B: oh no wonder, you really looking precious
Precious : *laughs* (blushing) thanks, can I have a few minutes of your time?
H3B : hmmm, (I mentioned her church’s name and she appeared shocked and I went on to tell her a fellow of hers had seen me earlier, lied that I let him preach to me, meanwhile I had tactically dismissed that one in a very smooth manner, I even left him with a smile on his face)
But she insisted on talking (mistake no. 1) she went on to tell me about a coming program of theirs first. And it began.
Precious: Are you born again?
H3B : yes
Precious : why do you think so?
Me: ‘cos with time I’ve come in terms with the conviction that I am.
Precious : (she goes on to try explain to me that I am wrong and the problem began fully, she quoted a bible verse which says if we confess with our mouth and believe in our hearts that Christ is our Lord and personal saviour we are born again and that is the answer she had expected.)
H3B : I am not a X-men kinda guy super hero that can read mind, wouldn’t know the exact answer you expect but would only give you my own view of answer in reference to the question you give, doesn’t mean I am wrong or automatically not born again, just same answer in different ways. (but she argued and asked if I want her to lead me to Christ) No, you’re not getting me because you are not listening, you didn’t even let me answer you fully (I spoke calmly), see, let’s use this analogy;
Let’s take “Are you born again?” as “what is neutralization reaction?” okay? Now a typical answer would be : it is a reaction between an acid and a base which yields salt and water only but that is sure not the only thing about neutralization reaction albeit neither does it mean the answer is wrong…
Precious : please abeg, we aren’t talking Chemistry here, question is are you saved? Would you love that I lead you to Christ?
H3B : I am with Christ already, else you would lead me out first and in later…
Precious : No oo, glad you’re saved, it was nice meeting you… And she scurried off!
You know on a second thought, I don’t think we’re ridiculous, I would prefer us as straight forward jolly fellows.
P.S: (she had earlier taken my number) do you think she will call?
God bless UNIBEN.
#H3B tales

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